A HEALING SOOTHING TOUCH The Awesome Art of Cristina Falasci
	APRIL 2005

by Don Huntington
Photos by Russell Byrne

Up until last year I’d had only one real massage in my life, and then it was simply recommended therapy for a twisted back. It felt good but I never wanted to get one again. Like many other men in our society, I considered massages to be “touchy-feeling” kinds of activities best reserved for women and for other men who could put up with being touched that much.

The safest attitude to maintain about massages, therefore, for many guys like me, is gentle scorn and avoidance. Massages were “for women” and “a man” wouldn’t typically get a massage unless some injury or pain made therapeutic treatments necessary. So when my wife and I would be at some Calistoga-type spa, I would let her get a session together with any other women who might be in our party, while I would go look at whatever scenic diversions happened to be in the area.

I changed my attitude through the influence of a remarkable massage practitioner named Cristina Falasci.

A Life-long Learner and Giver
Cristina possesses classically Nordic color and facial characteristics. When I first met her and heard her pleasantly accented English, I assumed, as many do, that she’s Swedish. However, it turns out that she’s of Italian/German descent and was raised in Brazil.

Cristina has gone to a lot of schooling in developing her bodywork therapy skills. She has a certificate in Swedish-Esalem and a certificate in Body/Mind Medicine from Harvard. She also has a certificate in Cranial-Sacral Therapy from the renowned Upledger Institute in Florida. She’s currently working on a degree in Health Science Education with an emphasis in gerontology.

I went through some testing times not too long ago when, in addition to the normal stresses and pressures of life, I simultaneously contracted cancer and my mom passed away. I was having a casual conversation with Cristina about our jobs and lives when she suddenly paused, looked deeply into my eyes, and said with startling perception, “I think you have been going through some difficult times, Don. Would you like to come to my studio? I will give you a massage session.”

We were only acquaintances at the time, but I later discovered that Cristina has a gift for telling whether a person is going through times of stress, possibly because a few years ago she went through some terrible things herself. At almost a single stroke, her beloved parents died, and her husband of 25 years left her, forcing her to live without support, home, or family.

All normal means of support had been ripped out of her life, so Cristina began to call upon those sources of strength that come from within and from without. She tapped reservoirs of energy, forgiveness, love, and grace that came from the depths of her spirit and, she believes, drew positive energies from the universe that lie all around us. She began patiently taking one simple step at a time to rebuild her home, her profession, and her spirit.

Stormy Weather
Nietzsche said, “What does not destroy me makes me stronger,” which became a demonstrable reality in Cristina’s life. She loves to quote Eckhart Tolle who, in The Power of Now, said, “Realize deeply that the present moment is all you ever have.” And she expresses her indomitable attitude by quoting Gandhi, “I will not let anyone walk through my mind with dirty feet.”

Quiet water flows deep, they say. Pain, loss, and grief must have become sharp tools that carved out great hollow spaces in Cristina’s soul so that those empty places could be filled with vibrant, peaceful, resignation and love. Now she has become not only an admirable illustration of Nietzsche’s quote, but a good advertisement for her profession, as well. Every time our paths cross I am profoundly moved by the sense of peace and serenity that mark Cristina’s spirit — and by the energy and intelligence of her mind.

Perhaps the growth of a sense of joyful humility is a natural outcome of learning through suffering for a person like her. In one of our early conversations, I told Cristina I wanted to discuss doing an article on her life and work, but she was more interested in discussing the history and character of East County, where she has lived for 23 years, than she was in talking about herself. She enthusiastically described the interesting people who inhabit our area and the surprisingly rich history that surrounds us.

During our conversations, Cristina always left me with the distinct impression that she really enjoyed talking to me. She is one of those few people with the wonderful grace of looking directly at any person she is talking with, while giving the impression that she is focusing her attention completely upon the conversation at hand.

Even before I knew her well, I was drawn by Cristina’s gentle qualities so, when she generously offered to give me a massage, I took her up on it. This was not because I felt in need of such a thing, since I lacked any of the specific aches and pains that, in my mind, should have justified getting a massage. I agreed because I had come to have complete confidence in her. If she said one of her massages would be good for me, then I was glad to give it the chance to do me some good.

Time out for Peace and Health
I entered Cristina’s office at the appointed time feeling a little awkward and uncertain of myself, but her professional manner and quiet energy in no time had me thoroughly enjoying the experience. Beginning with my scalp and ending with my toes, Cristina’s soothing touch passed over, around, and through the muscles of my body.

One of the reasons the experience was so wonderful, was that Cristina demonstrated a gift of exerting exactly the right amount of pressure. When she began working with my muscles, she said, “You must tell me if I exert too much pressure. This is to be soothing and healing, not painful. I don’t believe in ‘no pain; no gain’ when pain is unnecessary.” I never opened my mouth to give any feedback to Cristina about what she was doing. I got a distinct impression that, all by themselves, her hands seem to possess the ability to knead, stroke, and rub muscles at exactly the right pressure.

Another thing that surprised me was how strong Cristina is. She is a small-framed person but was able gently but vigorously to massage my muscles for over an hour-and-a-half. I enjoy giving backrubs and foot massages to my wife, but ten minutes seems like a long time. My hands and arms grow weary. Cristina did that for me, with much more energy than I use, for much longer.

I learned from the experience was how therapeutic massage can be. I didn’t have any particular aches or pains at the time, but I walked out of the office with a special sense of physical well being that didn’t leave me for several days. Also, I had been monitoring a high blood pressure problem for a few months. When I tested myself following the massage, I discovered that both systolic and diastolic readings were almost ten points lower than the lowest I had ever measured before.

The Wonders of Touching
A long time ago I made the discovery that most things that provide pleasure are not, at the same time, wonderfully healthy for you. My experience at the hands of Cristina ran exactly counter to that sad principle.

Americans tend to be touch-deprived. Our culture doesn’t provide a lot of spontaneous and natural opportunities for touching and being touched outside of sexual encounters. Grandparents often hold their grandchildren in loving embraces — hugging and holding them and giving them pats and rubs that many of us carry as fond memories into our old age. But for the most part, we lack those experiences in appropriate quantities. Parents often don’t hug their children, or vice versa. Teachers have stopped hugging their students and we tend not to touch each other at work because of the threat of lawsuits.

A long time ago, however, doctors began to research the beneficial effects of touch. Research at a hospital in England, for example, uncovered the sad truth that babies who were left as foundlings at the hospital contracted a disease, called wasting, that would usually kill them before they reached the age of two. The condition only appeared in babies that weren’t held as infants. The act of holding them and stroking them, on the other hand completely cured the “disease” or stopped it from ever appearing.

Modern researchers have uncovered a number of positive effects of touching and being touched on a regular basis. Some of them include:

• Helps the body's immune system
• Keeps the body healthier
• Cures depression
• Reduces stress
• Induces sleep
• Invigorates and rejuvenates the body
• Lowers blood pressure
• Increases the IQ (in infants)

Researchers learned not too long ago that the condition of teenagers with depression and anxiety symptoms improved — miraculously, in some cases — if a parent or friend would only give them regular, gentle backrubs.

I’m glad that we have people like Cristina in our East County. I’m grateful that I had the opportunity of meeting her and experiencing her soothing, healing touch for myself.

After the experience was over I said, “Give me a reason, Cristina, how to justify ever doing such a wonderful, self-indulgent thing again.” Cristina looked me right in the eye, in her typical fashion, and said with great seriousness. “Don, we only get a chance to go through this life once. We have only this one opportunity to do things for ourselves that improve the quality of our lives. Why should you not take advantage of opportunities that come your way to enjoy the happy, invigorating, life-sustaining experience you had today?”

She had me there. I couldn’t think of an answer. I’m going back!