DANCING MY WAY THROUGH LIFE Teaching Children Lessons on Dance and Life
	APRIL 2005

by Nina Koch
Photos by Russell Byrne

I grew up in San Jose and by age two I was out on the floor, moving around, and learning how to dance. My mom was a great dancer herself and some of my earliest memories are sitting in the corner and watching her and the other students dance. I got the dance bug early and by age 11 I had been promoted to assistant teacher at the Lauri Gray School of Dance. Two years later I was teaching my own classes. I really fell into an awesome opportunity at that dance studio.

We moved to Brentwood four years ago. Coming from a big place like San Jose and not having the anonymity of a big city still seems strange, at times — but it is great too! This city sometimes makes me feel like I’m part of a large extended family. I also appreciate the fact that East County is growing and now has nice places to shop so I can feed my love for shoes without driving a long way. (I don’t know how many pairs of shoes I own, but I bet my husband does.)

Getting Down to the Business of Dancing
Shortly after arriving in Brentwood, we moved a dance program from San Jose to the Community Center for a few months. The kids were really great and always fun to work with! I got a job in a dance studio and two months later got pregnant. By the end of the year the owner of the studio offered to sell me the business. My dream of having my own dance studio was about to become reality.

Sometimes the opportunities that come to us in life are accompanied by tremendous challenges. There I was, seven months pregnant and starting a new business! My baby was born in July and three weeks later I was teaching classes. I still don’t know how I found the strength to pull that off.

I often feel that I’m the luckiest person in the world. I’m amazed that I actually make money doing what I love to do. Since opening my Dance Dynamics Studio, there has never been a single day when I woke up and said, “Agggh! I don’t want to go to work today!” Getting paid to do things you would gladly do for free, if you could afford to, is a blessing for which I am continually grateful!

My first love is teaching, but I also love owning and running a business. I’m kind of a bossy person, I guess, so it is good to be the boss. I inherited some of my attitudes from my mom, who ingrained in my head the value of never becoming dependent upon anybody. I learned always to take care of myself, which is an important thing for any child to learn, I think, especially a girl.

I have a theory about destiny. You can follow it wherever it is leading, or you can grab it by the neck and shake it until it leads you where you want it to go. I was talking with a group of freshmen girls recently. “My husband is going to be a doctor,” one of them said. Another said that her husband was going to be a lawyer. Several of them said their husbands were going to be rich. Finally, I told them, “Why don’t you be the rich one? You be the doctor! You be the lawyer! Why not?”

Beyond Dance into Life
Dancing is obviously good for growing children who might need encouragement to get away from the TV and to get some exercise. Dancing is the best cure for the growing plague of childhood obesity that I know. It provides cardio workouts, plus stretching, coordination, rhythm, performance, and music training. Dance is marvelous for improving mental and social stability in everything from stage presence to a healthy self-image.

Dancing also provides great exercise in developing the left side of the brain, which deals with mastering sequence and organization, as well as the right side of the brain, which does such things as grasping spatial relationships, visualizing the physical arrangement of members in a group, etc. Dance also helps students learn to appreciate music, to find out about musical instruments, and to develop a sense of rhythm.

Learning to dance develops skills that children can use throughout their lives. For example, kids in dance class become accustomed to performing in front of their peers, often while watching themselves in mirrors. They are apt to be able to get up and give a book report with confidence and assurance. The sense of accomplishment that comes in all levels of learning dance becomes one more resource to be used in developing the child’s sense of self-esteem, making it easier for them to stay off drugs and away from cigarettes and drink.

Being a dance instructor is so great! I become part of my students’ lives. I help moms cope with some of the parenting problems they face. In most cases I exert a strong influence in my students’ development. The kids look up to me as their teacher. The older girls also begin looking up to me as the owner of my own business.

The teenage years are difficult for any child. My older students come to realize that they can talk to me about anything. When they come to me with bad news of some kind, I always say to them, “Go tell your mom. If you don’t, I will. Or we’ll tell her together.” It’s good for parents to know that there is another grown-up whom the parent knows and trusts that their children can go to. It really does take a village to raise a child, and I’ve become part of the fabric of the lives of a lot of my children.

Participant, Teacher, and Coach
I often give my students the message, “You are a strong dancer. You can do this.” One of my students said, “I want that typed, printed out at 125-point text, and then nailed on my wall.” These kids really listen and remember. The work ethic of some of my dancers is greater than that of many adults. It is wonderful to see their drive and to sense the passion they have for dance.

We have a competition team at my studio, but are countering the tendency of some dance studios with competition teams to minimize the efforts of the non-competitors. I pay great attention to our recreational dancers and believe that each of them must feel valued, challenged, and pushed towards doing their personal best as if they were getting ready for a competition.

We’re trying to establish expectations of excellence in our Dynamics Dance program. We won the honor of Best Dance Studio this year by votes from the community, and “Best of Parade” in Brentwood last year, becoming the first dance studio in the history of the Brentwood parade to win that honor. We got a $200 prize — which we spent on an excellent pizza party.

The standard of excellence spreads even to the parents of our dancing children. I hear horror stories from owners of other dance studios about the terrible behavior of some of their parents. I have no problems at all like that. My moms are great! My parents are an incredibly loyal, excited, and enthusiastic group of people who understand and support my vision. Thankfully, there’s not a “stage mom” among the whole bunch.

I never have any behavior problems, perhaps, because of the reputation I deliberately cultivate for not putting up with dysfunctional attitudes and behaviors. I conduct myself in a straightforward honest fashion and expect others to do so also. I don’t always follow parents’ wishes or advice, but they know that I always listen and carefully consider any comment they have. I’m not phony. Maybe the rep gets around.

Classes for Every Taste
I’m really pleased with my Dance Dynamics studio; I’m building an excellent program. Dance Dynamics offers dance classes for almost all tastes — everything from jazz dancing to ballet. Our lyrical dance classes provide a cross between jazz and ballet.

The ballet classes are especially fantastic, in my opinion. Our ballet teacher, Stephanie Knudson, came to me like an angel sent from God. She holds a Bachelor’s degree in Dance, plus a Master’s degree in Therapeutic Recreation. I’m grateful for her awesome abilities as a ballet teacher, because the skills developed in ballet should provide the foundation for any other kind of dance that the students go on to do.

Dance Dynamics has a couple hip-hop classes. Juanita Montenegro, who teaches these, is a beautiful dancer. She teaches a wide variety of dances, but is a great hip-hop teacher. Her classes are full with a long waiting list.

Melissa Goehring was my first hire. She’s been with me through a lot. In some ways Melissa is like the little sister I never had and is the greatest thing to ever happen to my dance studio. She’s a brilliant choreographer. The kids love her. She’s so cool! Not long ago Melissa performed a solo that Stephanie had choreographed for her. Most of the audience that day were moved to tears. I sure was!

I married my high school sweetheart. My husband works as a manager in SBC in San Ramon. On normal days the commute is not too bad but we are both hoping that someday the dance studio will support both of us — paying the bills for his golf and skiing, on one hand, and for my shoes, on the other. My husband would love to be a stay-at-home dad and take care of our little Gabby — an arrangement that would be good for all three of us, I think. If that ever happens, I’ll have to teach him to cook, however.

I really feel that I’m dancing my way through life these days. This is not simply because I own a dance school, but my whole life seems to be pulsing with exquisite patterns and rhythms. I’ve got the beat down! I’m figuring out the steps! I’m really getting caught up in this exciting ballet of life, and I’m moving in harmony with the beautiful people who are dancing all around me!